Dear All, We're in Mexico. And clothes-wise all that I have is all that I'm wearing. If I could offer you a few pieces of advice to guide your life they might go something like this... 1. Don't go to Miami - ever 2. Don't fly American Airlines (Mangesh I should have listened) 3. Pack everything useful to you in your carry-on luggage 4. Don't buy liquids in an airport Let me elaborate. Lisette and I arrived in Miami yesterday afternoon en-route to Cancun (Mexico). We thought it would be a simple matter of changing planes and off we go. No such luck. Instead we were stuck in the longest slowest moving queue we've ever experienced so we could go through "immigration". Why we had to do this since we had no interest in the USA apart from treating it as a glorified petrol station I don't know. Anyway you can't argue (well you can but people that do that are rarely seen again) and so we bided our time,buttoned our lips and finally got through. Lisette had been shopping for shampoo and suncream back at Heathrow. This standard activity made Lisette a clear threat to America and these items were thus confiscated by a venomous harridan in Miami airport. Somewhat unreasonable we felt given that the aforementioned items had been purchased air-side at *Heathrow airport*. For some inexplicable reason we had to pick up our bags and carry them 20 metres for them to be put onto the flight. So off to baggage reclaim we went, picked up Lisette's bag and then paused. No sign of my bag. Nothing. Nada. Nowt. In a mood borne of anger, frustration, tiredness and general fatigue I asked the nearest staff member - "Where's my bag?". "Que?" "Bag?" "Que?" "Bag?!" "No Ingelese" More conversations of this nature occurred, each with a different person. I soon came to the conclusions that - even though this was Miami NO-ONE SPOKE ENGLISH - no-one knew about my bag or was remotely interested in it. Having done all we could (and achieved nothing) we boarded the plane for Cancun where we hoped to miraculously see my bag appearing on the baggage carousel. We didn't. Not only that but we didn't see Lisette's either. At 4pm yesterday Lisette and I realised that we were done for. No clothes, no chargers, no summer dresses (Lisette not me). With heavy hearts we left the airport having left our details with the American Airlines staff. We headed for our destination - the Isla Mujeres (the Island of Women) - feeling pretty much pot-less. This story does not have an entirely sad ending as we are staying in a beautiful room that fronts onto a beach (Lisette very pleased). What's more in the morning we turned up for breakfast to discover that Lisette's bag had miraculously arrived! We have eaten gorgeous Mexican food (tortillas / yucatan eggs) and we're sleeping well. Spent the afternoon today by the pool in hammocks watching the local wildlife (birds and iguanas) flap and stroll around us. Alas though I still have no bag and I have yet to find a shop that extends it's range beyond ceramics, hats and beer-logo-ed t-shirts. Am fervently praying that I will either find more varied shops or my bag will turn up. If neither happens then I fear I will soon be feeling none-too-fresh... But it's a new feeling to be standing wearing pretty much all the possessions that I have to hand. Yours hopefully, John and Lisette PS "All property is theft man"

Hi All,

Am 30!

Dear all,

Lisette and I have finally made it to Bologna - and have officially left Tuscany behind. Now that we've got here I'm increasingly of the opinion that we never should have left. Bologna seems somewhat industrial, hostile and - dare I say it - mugging territory. (For the more nervous of you I haven't actually seen direct evidence of this - it's just a feeling)

Because then I wouldn't feel so bad....

Heard that song? Well that´s me (and Lisette) right now We signed ourselves up to do some white water rafting yesterday with a dutch girl in our hostel called Petri. The people doing the organising told us that the river was somewhere between the "6th and the 9th most dangerous in the world" ..... but that due to favourable weather conditions and rainfall recently "we should be fine". A little worried but still confident we signed up and set off early the next morning. It was at this point our guide started telling us things like "if you get caught underwater you should consider whether you want to die or break a bone to get free". Marvellous. By the time we actually got in the water it was with a large number of reservations and no small amount of fear. These fears seemed quite well justified once we´d been through the first couple of rapids and come fairly close to drowning. It was at this point I noticed that the strap that was supposed to anchor my left foot to the boat was missing... And that I was developing cramp in my left leg as I furiously held fast to the side of the dinghy for dear life... But I´ll not over-egg this story - we survived. We got sunburned. We got eaten by mosquitoes. We drank plenty of river water. We fell in the river. We were thrown in the river (our guides could be politely described as "mischievous"). We got scratched, bruised and battered.... but miraculously we didn´t die or suffer extensive injuries! But we hurt so much. It´s now about 24 hours since we finished and I feel I´ve aged about 70 years. I know what it´s like to be old now. I´ve had the sneak preview. Ouch. On the plus side we have at least picked a good spot in which to recuperate. Having spent our first 48 hours in Panama comparing the place to Gotham City on a dark night we have now reach a very pleasant spot. It´s like a Swiss mountain town but without the Swiss. It´s a village high up in the Western Panamanian hills called Boquete. I highly recommend it! Ít´s coffee country and we´ve toured a nearby coffee plantation and done a coffee tasting session. My sanity is definitely returning! I´m now off to have a Latte in one of the nearby cafes - at the respectable price of 1 US Dollar... thank you very much! I don´t think this place will stay like this long though. Americans that don´t like paying taxes have discovered this place with a vengeance and as I write this they are tearing down local coffee plantations to build gated communities. Bit sad really. Hope to bring you more cheerful news in our next missive, John and Lisette